javascript:void(0)
Friday, September 11, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Summer Movie On Point INSANITY
Yeah no updates in mad long. Clearly working full time all summer and being of legal age to attend bars has gotten in the way of my posting. But alas, I am here once again at my computer, sitting in the comforts of my nice new Hofstra University dormitory. People have asked me what I thought of the summer movies, and it's tough because I saw quite a few of them. And I am bored on my last day of summer, so I would love to go and give you ON POINT REVIEWS for all of them!
Star Trek
A re-boot of the classic Sci-Fi franchise. The Lost and Cloverfield icon J.J. Abrams took the helm, and the question was posed; Can you take the geekiest thing in the world and make the world love it?
Pros
-The action was great, sci-fi space battles are a hard thing to make truly unique, but the ship designs really made this a sight to see. The man to man (or man to Vulcan, man to Romulan, you know what I mean) were good too.
-The ensemble was great, Zach Quinto and Chris Pine leading perfectly as Spock and Kirk respectively. John Cho, Simon Pegg, Karl Urban, Zoe Saldana and Anton Yelchin filled out the Enterprise near perfectly as well. Not to mention Eric Bana was near unrecognizable as Captain Nero.
-It was fun, it never took itself too seriously and really made for a great experience.
Cons
-Leonard Nimoy, while a pleasure to have in the film, sort of lingered around. He didn't do much to advance the story after his initial scene, but he just kept coming back to offer more wisdom.
-There wasn't enough time to let the secondary characters bloom. It seemed as though they were brought in for one scene (Sulu's swordfight for instance) and then tossed back for some supporting lines here and there. But since this was the first in what will surely be a franchise, it's forgiveable.
The Hangover
The sleeper hit of the summer, four friends go to Las Vegas for a bachelor party and much chaos ensues.
Pros
-The ensemble worked well together. Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms and Zach Galifinakis bounced off of each other very well. While Zach clearly stole the show with his awkwardness, Cooper's overexcited schoolteacher was my favorite.
-Visually, the movie was really good. There were some instances where I forgot I was watching a comedy because the shots of Vegas were so good.
-The whole "crazy stuff happens in Vegas" thing worked out to the movies' advantage. It was a bit cliché, but the movie didn't aim to challenge.
-Mike Tyson. Enough said.
Cons
-Galifinakis seemed to constantly push the limit of what he was doing, and several times, his character cracked incredibly dumb jokes, that even in context were just stupid.
-It got a lot of hype to be the next iconic comedy of this generation, and I feel as though it isn't at all. It's a fun, thoughtless comedy that is just around for laughs.
-It teetered between serious and over-the-top too much. Ed Helms falling for the stripper, while Ken Jeong hops out of the trunk of a car naked...two complete opposites that made the pacing a tad awkward.
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Robots blow things up, Megan Fox walks around all hot and stuff. Shia Labeof spits out quirky one liners.
Pros
-The first 45 minutes retained the fun over the original Transformers. It was fun, light hearted and didn't take itself seriously.
-The CGI is incredible, truly a sight to see.
-John Turturro, while spitting out terrible dialogue, manages to be funny against all odds.
-Megan Fox is incredible, truly a sight to see.
Cons
-After the first 45 minutes, the movie gets completely random, too hard to follow and downright stupid, and not in a good way like the first one.
-Too many robots! The first one was good because you could keep track of what Autobots and Decepticons were on the front line. The motorcycle trio, the Fallen, the old man...to many!
-Too much pointless action. Now I like things blowing up like any living male, but I'd like there to be a reason. It seemed that every chance Bay was given to blow something up he did.
-Megan Fox can't act. But did you really go to see her act?
Bruno
The guy who grew a dirty mustache to play Borat brings his third Ali G show character to the U.S.A. in this homophobe targeting flick.
Pros
-There is a lot of shock humor in here. Unexpected stuff left and right.
-Bruno really pushes some people to their brink and it's hilarious. A scene when he interviews parents about their babies modeling for him shows just how irrational some people can be.
-Larry Charles (director) has a knack for good timing. He lets the awkwardness settle in when it needs to, and he cuts away to accentuate a joke that doesn't need anything at all.
-The final "real" bit is fantastic, I laughed for a long time.
-One celebrity cameo is so funny that it lingers around the whole film, and at points you find yourself saying "Remember when that famous person made that great line?" and started chuckling again.
-They get the "fashionisto" bits out the way early. Those were his worst parts on the TV show. Putting him out of his element is much funnier than keeping him in it.
Cons
-The staged bits in this weren't as effective as they were in Borat. They seemed to just make too many awkward gay jokes, whereas in Borat, they actually developed the "story."
-While Borat pointed out the racism and ignorance in Americans while they let their guard down around him, Bruno merely pointed out the homophobia in people. While that was certainly funny, it didn't offer that same look at society that Bruno did.
-Male nudity urks me. And there is one scene of excessive male nudity.
Funny People
Judd Apatow directs this flick about a dying comedian who employs a young up-and-comer to help him organize his life.
Pros
-Sandler plays his best dramatic role to date, and perhaps that can be attributed to the fact that he plays a darker version of himself.
-The ensemble cast is good. Schwartsman and Hill especially compliment each other and Rogen. Bit parts from RZA and Aziz Ansari are good too.
-The stand-up comedy is really funny.
-Eric Bana's arrival is great, and he is hysterical.
-The cameos are for the most part great, Eminem, Ray Romano, Sarah Silverman, Dave Attell, Norm MacDonald, James Taylor, Justin Long. It added a little flare to the flick.
Cons
-It was too long and poorly paced. Had it flowed in the optimal way, it could have been his best movie, and an award contender for sure.
-Rogen didn't do much. In Knocked Up he showed us that he could put some heart to his slacker, here he's just a guy who wants to make it.
-Not enough of the bit parts from RZA and Aziz Ansari.
-The relationship between Rogen's character and Aubrey Plaza's was kind of forced. It could have been a real focal point of the movie.
-It was promoted as a comedy when really it was a drama. A bit more comedy couldn't have hurt it, but it was a real bad job on the PR part.
District 9
Aliens who are stuck on earth are treated like dirt.
Pros
-The small budget is used fatastically. The special effects are really good and real looking.
-All of the weapons used by the aliens are awesome and innovative. It's good to see new things in a movie like this.
-Sharlto Coply is a very convincing lead. Considering this was his first acting role, I think he deserves much kudos.
-The fights are great, they are subdued and minimal, but when stuff goes down, it goes down hardcore.
-The plot takes some strange archs, as characters turn their back on each other left and right.
Cons
-The flick segways from a mockumentary to a movie poorly. It keeps going back and forth.
-In the end, the film comes to a bit of a ragtag action ending. While most of the story is logical and proves points socially, the end does nothing more than showboat the CG, which is great.
Inglorious Basterds
Quentin Tarantino kills Hitler.
Pros
-Tarantino's dialogue is great, the first scene in which "The Jew Hunter" interviews a farmer who may or may not be housing Nazi's is superb. He builds tension so well and delivers in the release.
-Pitt plays his best character since Snatch. Aldo Raine is a hilariously brutal individual.
-The brief action sequences are satisfying to no end.
-The interweaving plots are interesting. To see them connect at the end is cool.
-Christopher Waltz was fantastic, he played the manipulative Nazi so well.
Cons
-Not enough of the Basterds. They were on screen for only a brief period of time.
-The pacing was off at times, while not as bad as in Funny People, it could have had a few minutes trimmed and it would have been fine.
-The secondary Basterds weren't given enough time, B.J. Novak and Samm Levine especially. That's just cause I'm a comedy geek.
-Mike Myers served no real purpose, he may have been good, but he didn't do anything.
ALRIGHT that about wraps it up. I'm seeing Up this weekend! Finally!
Star Trek
A re-boot of the classic Sci-Fi franchise. The Lost and Cloverfield icon J.J. Abrams took the helm, and the question was posed; Can you take the geekiest thing in the world and make the world love it?
Pros
-The action was great, sci-fi space battles are a hard thing to make truly unique, but the ship designs really made this a sight to see. The man to man (or man to Vulcan, man to Romulan, you know what I mean) were good too.
-The ensemble was great, Zach Quinto and Chris Pine leading perfectly as Spock and Kirk respectively. John Cho, Simon Pegg, Karl Urban, Zoe Saldana and Anton Yelchin filled out the Enterprise near perfectly as well. Not to mention Eric Bana was near unrecognizable as Captain Nero.
-It was fun, it never took itself too seriously and really made for a great experience.
Cons
-Leonard Nimoy, while a pleasure to have in the film, sort of lingered around. He didn't do much to advance the story after his initial scene, but he just kept coming back to offer more wisdom.
-There wasn't enough time to let the secondary characters bloom. It seemed as though they were brought in for one scene (Sulu's swordfight for instance) and then tossed back for some supporting lines here and there. But since this was the first in what will surely be a franchise, it's forgiveable.
The Hangover
The sleeper hit of the summer, four friends go to Las Vegas for a bachelor party and much chaos ensues.
Pros
-The ensemble worked well together. Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms and Zach Galifinakis bounced off of each other very well. While Zach clearly stole the show with his awkwardness, Cooper's overexcited schoolteacher was my favorite.
-Visually, the movie was really good. There were some instances where I forgot I was watching a comedy because the shots of Vegas were so good.
-The whole "crazy stuff happens in Vegas" thing worked out to the movies' advantage. It was a bit cliché, but the movie didn't aim to challenge.
-Mike Tyson. Enough said.
Cons
-Galifinakis seemed to constantly push the limit of what he was doing, and several times, his character cracked incredibly dumb jokes, that even in context were just stupid.
-It got a lot of hype to be the next iconic comedy of this generation, and I feel as though it isn't at all. It's a fun, thoughtless comedy that is just around for laughs.
-It teetered between serious and over-the-top too much. Ed Helms falling for the stripper, while Ken Jeong hops out of the trunk of a car naked...two complete opposites that made the pacing a tad awkward.
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Robots blow things up, Megan Fox walks around all hot and stuff. Shia Labeof spits out quirky one liners.
Pros
-The first 45 minutes retained the fun over the original Transformers. It was fun, light hearted and didn't take itself seriously.
-The CGI is incredible, truly a sight to see.
-John Turturro, while spitting out terrible dialogue, manages to be funny against all odds.
-Megan Fox is incredible, truly a sight to see.
Cons
-After the first 45 minutes, the movie gets completely random, too hard to follow and downright stupid, and not in a good way like the first one.
-Too many robots! The first one was good because you could keep track of what Autobots and Decepticons were on the front line. The motorcycle trio, the Fallen, the old man...to many!
-Too much pointless action. Now I like things blowing up like any living male, but I'd like there to be a reason. It seemed that every chance Bay was given to blow something up he did.
-Megan Fox can't act. But did you really go to see her act?
Bruno
The guy who grew a dirty mustache to play Borat brings his third Ali G show character to the U.S.A. in this homophobe targeting flick.
Pros
-There is a lot of shock humor in here. Unexpected stuff left and right.
-Bruno really pushes some people to their brink and it's hilarious. A scene when he interviews parents about their babies modeling for him shows just how irrational some people can be.
-Larry Charles (director) has a knack for good timing. He lets the awkwardness settle in when it needs to, and he cuts away to accentuate a joke that doesn't need anything at all.
-The final "real" bit is fantastic, I laughed for a long time.
-One celebrity cameo is so funny that it lingers around the whole film, and at points you find yourself saying "Remember when that famous person made that great line?" and started chuckling again.
-They get the "fashionisto" bits out the way early. Those were his worst parts on the TV show. Putting him out of his element is much funnier than keeping him in it.
Cons
-The staged bits in this weren't as effective as they were in Borat. They seemed to just make too many awkward gay jokes, whereas in Borat, they actually developed the "story."
-While Borat pointed out the racism and ignorance in Americans while they let their guard down around him, Bruno merely pointed out the homophobia in people. While that was certainly funny, it didn't offer that same look at society that Bruno did.
-Male nudity urks me. And there is one scene of excessive male nudity.
Funny People
Judd Apatow directs this flick about a dying comedian who employs a young up-and-comer to help him organize his life.
Pros
-Sandler plays his best dramatic role to date, and perhaps that can be attributed to the fact that he plays a darker version of himself.
-The ensemble cast is good. Schwartsman and Hill especially compliment each other and Rogen. Bit parts from RZA and Aziz Ansari are good too.
-The stand-up comedy is really funny.
-Eric Bana's arrival is great, and he is hysterical.
-The cameos are for the most part great, Eminem, Ray Romano, Sarah Silverman, Dave Attell, Norm MacDonald, James Taylor, Justin Long. It added a little flare to the flick.
Cons
-It was too long and poorly paced. Had it flowed in the optimal way, it could have been his best movie, and an award contender for sure.
-Rogen didn't do much. In Knocked Up he showed us that he could put some heart to his slacker, here he's just a guy who wants to make it.
-Not enough of the bit parts from RZA and Aziz Ansari.
-The relationship between Rogen's character and Aubrey Plaza's was kind of forced. It could have been a real focal point of the movie.
-It was promoted as a comedy when really it was a drama. A bit more comedy couldn't have hurt it, but it was a real bad job on the PR part.
District 9
Aliens who are stuck on earth are treated like dirt.
Pros
-The small budget is used fatastically. The special effects are really good and real looking.
-All of the weapons used by the aliens are awesome and innovative. It's good to see new things in a movie like this.
-Sharlto Coply is a very convincing lead. Considering this was his first acting role, I think he deserves much kudos.
-The fights are great, they are subdued and minimal, but when stuff goes down, it goes down hardcore.
-The plot takes some strange archs, as characters turn their back on each other left and right.
Cons
-The flick segways from a mockumentary to a movie poorly. It keeps going back and forth.
-In the end, the film comes to a bit of a ragtag action ending. While most of the story is logical and proves points socially, the end does nothing more than showboat the CG, which is great.
Inglorious Basterds
Quentin Tarantino kills Hitler.
Pros
-Tarantino's dialogue is great, the first scene in which "The Jew Hunter" interviews a farmer who may or may not be housing Nazi's is superb. He builds tension so well and delivers in the release.
-Pitt plays his best character since Snatch. Aldo Raine is a hilariously brutal individual.
-The brief action sequences are satisfying to no end.
-The interweaving plots are interesting. To see them connect at the end is cool.
-Christopher Waltz was fantastic, he played the manipulative Nazi so well.
Cons
-Not enough of the Basterds. They were on screen for only a brief period of time.
-The pacing was off at times, while not as bad as in Funny People, it could have had a few minutes trimmed and it would have been fine.
-The secondary Basterds weren't given enough time, B.J. Novak and Samm Levine especially. That's just cause I'm a comedy geek.
-Mike Myers served no real purpose, he may have been good, but he didn't do anything.
ALRIGHT that about wraps it up. I'm seeing Up this weekend! Finally!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Bumpin' #1
Okay, so my updates have been scarce since returning home from school. So I want a way to beef up my backlog without wasting your time. I was at the Ring of Honor Manhattan Mayhem III show on Saturday and I wanted to write about that, but since my last entry prior to it was a wrestling related piece, I figured it's smarter to space things out. I know how frustrating it must be for non-wrestling fans to come here awaiting music and film insights just to hear about men in tights...so I present a quick new piece I will be posting from time to time "Bumpin" which will have me giving you a look into what I am listening to currently and some reasons why...
So without any further ado...
BUMPIN' 6/17/09
Mos Def- Black on Both Sides, The Ecstatic
I am so annoyed all the time by Mos Def's ego, he talks crazy in public and thinks he's the best GD person alive. And The New Danger was a waste of time, not to say it wasn't a good idea, it was just poorly eecuted (the comp I'm on has no key for the letter that follows W). But Black is a classic in my mind and is a frequent listen and while I told everyone I had no desire to hear Ecstatic, I purchased it with several coupons and discounts after hearing it wa recieving etremely (again, sorry) reviews. It's like classic Mos, so get on that if you haven't yet.
Sugar Ray- Greatest Hits
I missed the train on these guys back in the day and am just making up for it now. It's ridiculously fun and sing-a-long worthy. The vocal harmonies are also great.
Justice-Cross
Another one I feel I should've been into earlier. This album is awesome and fun and although it gets a bit repetitive, it's dance music so it's all good.
House of Pain- Fine Malt Lyrics
Everlast is the man and a while ago I picked up this album for like $5 and didn't think twice about it aside from "Jump Around" until about 6 months ago when I started really getting into it. Maybe it's because of DJ Lethal's Limp Bizkit affiliation (a brief obsession I had, no regrets), but I've been heavy into this album and it's really underrated. While Danny Boy (the one that's NOT Everlast, as you'll clearly hear when listening) can sound like an idiot, there's no denying that for a bunch of white Irish guys, the House of Pain can really kick some ass.
Rage Against the Machine- Evil Empire
Surprisingly, this album only has one huge hit on it. While it doesn't pack the same punch as their self titled album, the grooves are certainly great on this one. Wilk and Commerford (drums and bass for those unaware) really highlight Tom Morello's quirky guitar effect work which really highlights Zack's raps. A great album that often goes overlooked, as it's sandwiched in by the truly definable Rage albums.
See you later!
So without any further ado...
BUMPIN' 6/17/09
Mos Def- Black on Both Sides, The Ecstatic
I am so annoyed all the time by Mos Def's ego, he talks crazy in public and thinks he's the best GD person alive. And The New Danger was a waste of time, not to say it wasn't a good idea, it was just poorly eecuted (the comp I'm on has no key for the letter that follows W). But Black is a classic in my mind and is a frequent listen and while I told everyone I had no desire to hear Ecstatic, I purchased it with several coupons and discounts after hearing it wa recieving etremely (again, sorry) reviews. It's like classic Mos, so get on that if you haven't yet.
Sugar Ray- Greatest Hits
I missed the train on these guys back in the day and am just making up for it now. It's ridiculously fun and sing-a-long worthy. The vocal harmonies are also great.
Justice-Cross
Another one I feel I should've been into earlier. This album is awesome and fun and although it gets a bit repetitive, it's dance music so it's all good.
House of Pain- Fine Malt Lyrics
Everlast is the man and a while ago I picked up this album for like $5 and didn't think twice about it aside from "Jump Around" until about 6 months ago when I started really getting into it. Maybe it's because of DJ Lethal's Limp Bizkit affiliation (a brief obsession I had, no regrets), but I've been heavy into this album and it's really underrated. While Danny Boy (the one that's NOT Everlast, as you'll clearly hear when listening) can sound like an idiot, there's no denying that for a bunch of white Irish guys, the House of Pain can really kick some ass.
Rage Against the Machine- Evil Empire
Surprisingly, this album only has one huge hit on it. While it doesn't pack the same punch as their self titled album, the grooves are certainly great on this one. Wilk and Commerford (drums and bass for those unaware) really highlight Tom Morello's quirky guitar effect work which really highlights Zack's raps. A great album that often goes overlooked, as it's sandwiched in by the truly definable Rage albums.
See you later!
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
WWE Extreme Rules Pay-Per-View Review
Before I begin let me say that I'm not 100% on the match order, but all the matches are there.
I’ve never written a review for a pay-per-view before so I’m going to do this as follows: Give my pre-show thoughts, rate each match individually, and then give my overall thoughts. Okay? Good.
PRE-SHOW THOUGHTS:
I was mildly interested in watching this show. The card was underwhelming, and the fact that WWE has cut so much “extreme” stuff like bleeding and dangerous moves from their now TV-PG rated programming really lead me to believe that this show was going to be a really weak representation of what “extreme” truly is. And with the recent release of Mr. Kennedy, I’ve been down on the company. So the odds were definitely stacked against the ol’ WWE for this event.
MATCH #1:
FATAL FOUR WAY for the UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP
MONTEL VONTAVIOUS PORTER vs. MATT HARDY vs. WILLIAM REGAL vs. (c) KOFI KINGSTON
What urked me about this match initially is that somehow putting four guys in a match all of a sudden makes it “extreme.” They really didn’t let any of the guys show off their stuff, as each of these four truly are fantastic performers. Kofi hit a few good moves, Matt kind of bummed around, MVP was way over and Regal was very clearly the man to hate, regardless of his immense skill. I thought Kofi botched the finishing kick on Regal, but then I realized that Kofi’s finisher just sucks.
2/5
MATCH #2
NO HOLDS BARRED for the INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP
Chris Jericho vs. (c) Rey Mysterio
Should have been prior to the first heavyweight title match. This feud has been a fun one to watch, and while Jericho is playing the stereotypical angry-at-the-world heel right now, he was really selling his dislike for Rey as a whole leading into this match. But like so much of the WWE’s product in recent years, this didn’t live up to expectations at all. There were a couple of good moments, mostly Jericho jumping out of the way of Mysterio’s now overly clichéd cruiserweight moves and countering them. A great spot with Jericho hitting the Code Breaker against Rey’s West Coast Pop. The end of the match was good, and when I realized that Jericho was holding Rey’s mask I went crazy. This match is definitely a great way to re-ignite this fed and have Rey come off as a lot more menacing. Jericho seems to be used to rejuvenate stars that really need to get over stars that have faded over the years, and right now he is doing a fine job.
3/5
MATCH #3
SAMOAN STAP MATCH
C.M. Punk vs. Umaga
I had no desire to see this match. Up until last month I thought Umaga was garbage, and although he has definitely stepped up in the ring, I still think he’s not a good fit for Punk. But this match exceeded all of my expectations. I had no idea the point was to hit all four corners in succession to win the match, as the only strap matches I have seen have just involved guys chained together. Umaga definitely sold Punk as winning, which is good, as many big guys never seem to be able to put over smaller, more technical guys. Punk won with a good spot and solidified his place as the good guy...
2.5/5
MATCH #4
HOG PEN MATCH for the MISS WRESTLEMANIA TITLE
Santina Marella vs. Vicki Guerrero w/ Chavo Guerrero
Santino is by far the funniest guy in the WWE right now, and his stuff is generally good. But once this SantinA gimmick started, I really started hating the writing team. It’s stupid and it’s not over and it’s not making anyone involved in the feud look at all credible. A year and a half ago Chavo was in a great feud with C.M. Punk for the ECW belt, and now he’s been reduced to having mud thrown at him since his widow Aunt wants her honor defended. Where’s the honor in booking a Hog Pen Match?
.5/5
MATCH #5
EXTREME RULES MATCH for the ECW TITLE
Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger vs. (c) Christian
As I said in my pre-show comments, any and all remnants of “extreme” are more or less gone from the WWE right now and this match really nailed the coffin shut in my mind. The stipulation that if Dreamer lost, he’d have to retire clearly failed, as everyone had seemed to forget that was the case until a few weeks ago when they tried to re-ignite the feud between him and Swagger. The reason he was only ECW champion for like 15 minutes back in the comapny’s prime was because he doesn’t really work in the “main event,” and while he tossed Christian and Swagger into garbage cans, he definitely didn’t come off as all that extreme here. We’ll see how he does in the future, but this match didn’t give off it’s desired effect, and the crowd was not into Tommy at all, so that really took away from the ending of the match.
2.5/5
MATCH #6
CAGE MATCH for the WWETITLE
Batista vs. (c) Randy Orton
Cage matches suck. To non-fans they seem appealing, but to anyone who has watched wrestling for over a year, they know that there are only so many ways you can toss someone into a steel fence. And the match played out so poorly too, it was like neither men had ever watched (mind you, both have been in several) a cage match in their entire career. Batista winning, while dumb and illogical considering he has a torn tricep, really will open the door for Orton to do things aside from chase the belt, as his character really has a lot that he can do.
1/5
MATCH #7
SUBMISSION MATCH
John Cena vs. The Big Show
When I think of a great submission bout, these two men don’t even enter into my brain one bit. There are so many good technical wrestlers on the card who could’ve taken this and made it interesting, but they had to sell the fact that even though Cena has taken Show out a hundred times, he still had to win an uphill battle. And the finish was stupid, the fact that Cena used the ropes to get Show to tap is bogus, as in any match, when someone reaches the ropes the hold must be broken. It was predictable and lame, but recently, all of Cena’s work has been such.
1.5/5
MATCH #8
LADDER MATCH for the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE
Jeff Hardy vs. (c) EDGE
The bit before this match about how these guys have been throwing each other off ladders for ten years was good and gave some true meaning to this match. And overall it was great. I’m not too big on Jeff Hardy to be honest, and judging him by a spot-fest ladder match is certainly unfair to the great technical guys like Regal and Finlay, but he entertained the hell out of me. Edge took the spots better than Jeff most of the time, and the bump that broke the ladder was really awesome. The way the match ended was great too. Jeff stuck Edge between rungs of the ladder, and Edge flailed around as Jeff snatched the belt. It was badass.
4/5
BUT WAIT...
MATCH #9
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH
C.M. Punk vs. (c) Jeff Hardy
Me and my friends had jokingly foreshadowed Punk coming out to cash in the Money in the Bank briefcase, but we literally went nuts when it actually happened. The music hit and Punk looked like he was ready to become a heel. Jeff was all battered and Punk was just smirking staring at him, it was tense. He quickly hit the Go To Sleep, but when Jeff kicked out it really seemed like Punk was actually going to lose, but thankfully they played it out realistically and Jeff couldn’t take any more of the fresh faced Punk after a second GTS. I was skeptical about how they would make Punk react, as he might apologize to Jeff and stay face, but when he started strutting around the ring playing the belt like it were a guitar, you could just tell how good of a bad guy he’s going to be.
3/5 (for a match, 5/5 for a shock)
OVERALL THOUGHTS:
The show was wildly inconsistent and way too short. There were four great matches, one of which was based entirely on shock value.
I’ve never written a review for a pay-per-view before so I’m going to do this as follows: Give my pre-show thoughts, rate each match individually, and then give my overall thoughts. Okay? Good.
PRE-SHOW THOUGHTS:
I was mildly interested in watching this show. The card was underwhelming, and the fact that WWE has cut so much “extreme” stuff like bleeding and dangerous moves from their now TV-PG rated programming really lead me to believe that this show was going to be a really weak representation of what “extreme” truly is. And with the recent release of Mr. Kennedy, I’ve been down on the company. So the odds were definitely stacked against the ol’ WWE for this event.
MATCH #1:
FATAL FOUR WAY for the UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP
MONTEL VONTAVIOUS PORTER vs. MATT HARDY vs. WILLIAM REGAL vs. (c) KOFI KINGSTON
What urked me about this match initially is that somehow putting four guys in a match all of a sudden makes it “extreme.” They really didn’t let any of the guys show off their stuff, as each of these four truly are fantastic performers. Kofi hit a few good moves, Matt kind of bummed around, MVP was way over and Regal was very clearly the man to hate, regardless of his immense skill. I thought Kofi botched the finishing kick on Regal, but then I realized that Kofi’s finisher just sucks.
2/5
MATCH #2
NO HOLDS BARRED for the INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP
Chris Jericho vs. (c) Rey Mysterio
Should have been prior to the first heavyweight title match. This feud has been a fun one to watch, and while Jericho is playing the stereotypical angry-at-the-world heel right now, he was really selling his dislike for Rey as a whole leading into this match. But like so much of the WWE’s product in recent years, this didn’t live up to expectations at all. There were a couple of good moments, mostly Jericho jumping out of the way of Mysterio’s now overly clichéd cruiserweight moves and countering them. A great spot with Jericho hitting the Code Breaker against Rey’s West Coast Pop. The end of the match was good, and when I realized that Jericho was holding Rey’s mask I went crazy. This match is definitely a great way to re-ignite this fed and have Rey come off as a lot more menacing. Jericho seems to be used to rejuvenate stars that really need to get over stars that have faded over the years, and right now he is doing a fine job.
3/5
MATCH #3
SAMOAN STAP MATCH
C.M. Punk vs. Umaga
I had no desire to see this match. Up until last month I thought Umaga was garbage, and although he has definitely stepped up in the ring, I still think he’s not a good fit for Punk. But this match exceeded all of my expectations. I had no idea the point was to hit all four corners in succession to win the match, as the only strap matches I have seen have just involved guys chained together. Umaga definitely sold Punk as winning, which is good, as many big guys never seem to be able to put over smaller, more technical guys. Punk won with a good spot and solidified his place as the good guy...
2.5/5
MATCH #4
HOG PEN MATCH for the MISS WRESTLEMANIA TITLE
Santina Marella vs. Vicki Guerrero w/ Chavo Guerrero
Santino is by far the funniest guy in the WWE right now, and his stuff is generally good. But once this SantinA gimmick started, I really started hating the writing team. It’s stupid and it’s not over and it’s not making anyone involved in the feud look at all credible. A year and a half ago Chavo was in a great feud with C.M. Punk for the ECW belt, and now he’s been reduced to having mud thrown at him since his widow Aunt wants her honor defended. Where’s the honor in booking a Hog Pen Match?
.5/5
MATCH #5
EXTREME RULES MATCH for the ECW TITLE
Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger vs. (c) Christian
As I said in my pre-show comments, any and all remnants of “extreme” are more or less gone from the WWE right now and this match really nailed the coffin shut in my mind. The stipulation that if Dreamer lost, he’d have to retire clearly failed, as everyone had seemed to forget that was the case until a few weeks ago when they tried to re-ignite the feud between him and Swagger. The reason he was only ECW champion for like 15 minutes back in the comapny’s prime was because he doesn’t really work in the “main event,” and while he tossed Christian and Swagger into garbage cans, he definitely didn’t come off as all that extreme here. We’ll see how he does in the future, but this match didn’t give off it’s desired effect, and the crowd was not into Tommy at all, so that really took away from the ending of the match.
2.5/5
MATCH #6
CAGE MATCH for the WWETITLE
Batista vs. (c) Randy Orton
Cage matches suck. To non-fans they seem appealing, but to anyone who has watched wrestling for over a year, they know that there are only so many ways you can toss someone into a steel fence. And the match played out so poorly too, it was like neither men had ever watched (mind you, both have been in several) a cage match in their entire career. Batista winning, while dumb and illogical considering he has a torn tricep, really will open the door for Orton to do things aside from chase the belt, as his character really has a lot that he can do.
1/5
MATCH #7
SUBMISSION MATCH
John Cena vs. The Big Show
When I think of a great submission bout, these two men don’t even enter into my brain one bit. There are so many good technical wrestlers on the card who could’ve taken this and made it interesting, but they had to sell the fact that even though Cena has taken Show out a hundred times, he still had to win an uphill battle. And the finish was stupid, the fact that Cena used the ropes to get Show to tap is bogus, as in any match, when someone reaches the ropes the hold must be broken. It was predictable and lame, but recently, all of Cena’s work has been such.
1.5/5
MATCH #8
LADDER MATCH for the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE
Jeff Hardy vs. (c) EDGE
The bit before this match about how these guys have been throwing each other off ladders for ten years was good and gave some true meaning to this match. And overall it was great. I’m not too big on Jeff Hardy to be honest, and judging him by a spot-fest ladder match is certainly unfair to the great technical guys like Regal and Finlay, but he entertained the hell out of me. Edge took the spots better than Jeff most of the time, and the bump that broke the ladder was really awesome. The way the match ended was great too. Jeff stuck Edge between rungs of the ladder, and Edge flailed around as Jeff snatched the belt. It was badass.
4/5
BUT WAIT...
MATCH #9
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH
C.M. Punk vs. (c) Jeff Hardy
Me and my friends had jokingly foreshadowed Punk coming out to cash in the Money in the Bank briefcase, but we literally went nuts when it actually happened. The music hit and Punk looked like he was ready to become a heel. Jeff was all battered and Punk was just smirking staring at him, it was tense. He quickly hit the Go To Sleep, but when Jeff kicked out it really seemed like Punk was actually going to lose, but thankfully they played it out realistically and Jeff couldn’t take any more of the fresh faced Punk after a second GTS. I was skeptical about how they would make Punk react, as he might apologize to Jeff and stay face, but when he started strutting around the ring playing the belt like it were a guitar, you could just tell how good of a bad guy he’s going to be.
3/5 (for a match, 5/5 for a shock)
OVERALL THOUGHTS:
The show was wildly inconsistent and way too short. There were four great matches, one of which was based entirely on shock value.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
SALE TIME!
Hey everyone! I, like so many of you, like to wade through my things from time to time and get rid of some stuff, for no other reason than to save space. I do that on a somewhat frequent basis with DVD's and CD's, sometimes 2 or 3 times a year. So I am giving you the opportunity to get some deals on some good ass movies and CD's, all of which have the official D-WINCHELL seal of approval.
DVD's:
Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Peral 2-Disc
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest 2-Disc
Zoolander
Edward Scissorhands 10th Anniversary Edition
CD's:
Count the Stars
Living Colour-Vivid
Beastie Boys-Some Old Bullshit
Ari Hest-The Break In
G-Unit-T.O.S. Terminate On Sight
Solange- Sol-Angel and the Hooley St. Dreams
Posters:
Snakes on a Plane
The Transporter 3 (small)
X-Men (custom DVD promo poster)
...and remember, I thoroughly enjoyed all of these items, I'm just simply cleaning my shelves of things I've watched too many times or had on my walls too long! YOU NAME THE PRICE and I'll consider and more than likely accept your offer!
DVD's:
Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Peral 2-Disc
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest 2-Disc
Zoolander
Edward Scissorhands 10th Anniversary Edition
CD's:
Count the Stars
Living Colour-Vivid
Beastie Boys-Some Old Bullshit
Ari Hest-The Break In
G-Unit-T.O.S. Terminate On Sight
Solange- Sol-Angel and the Hooley St. Dreams
Posters:
Snakes on a Plane
The Transporter 3 (small)
X-Men (custom DVD promo poster)
...and remember, I thoroughly enjoyed all of these items, I'm just simply cleaning my shelves of things I've watched too many times or had on my walls too long! YOU NAME THE PRICE and I'll consider and more than likely accept your offer!
Friday, May 8, 2009
We Like Sportz
My favorite Lonely Island song, the lack of enthusiasm in their voices is what makes it good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
